I am a bit of a ‘Jonah’ when it comes to eating out.

Far too many family meals out have led to me trying to make an order and what I want is completely out of stock. This could be a drink or a main course but happens all the time.

It has become almost a family joke that everyone gets what they want and I end up having to rethink my options.

Suffice to say, my second option is usually a little disappointing too and I end up having a substandard meal, whilst being pretty used to it.

This is exactly what happened when I met up with my great friend, Jane for a meal at a local restaurant.

Oranges and Lemons

We had planned to go the week before but due to personal issues, we both had to postpone it. Fast forward a week and it was a gorgeous sunny day and we had a table booked for 7pm at ‘Bills’

Bills is a large chain of restaurants, which I have dined at in several locations; Birmingham, London and my local one (on many occasions)

Off to Bill’s

Arriving at the restaurant there were two groups of people in the queue before me, waiting to be seated. I knew that Jane was already seated, but knowing I had to book in and get my temperature read meant I couldn’t just walk up to where she was sitting.

The groups ahead were scanned and seated and I was thankfully shown to a table outside with views over a wonderful lake.

Jane had a cocktail on the table already, so I had a look at the menu and chose a non-alcoholic one for myself – a Cederberg Sparkle which combines Ceders Classic ‘alt-gin’ served over ice with Fever-Tree White Grape and Apricot Soda.

The waitress took my order and went to get my drink.

In the meantime I had a look at the menu and was torn between two different main courses. Jane and I have been for numerous meals out and we always go for a main course and a dessert, rather than a starter.

The waitress came back empty handed.

‘I am sorry but we are out of the Ceders, I am afraid’

Good Non-Alcoholic Section

Well, I am quite a tolerant girl, so I ordered a ‘Peach and Ginger Trip’. That was out of stock too.

I looked at the menu again and noticed there was a 0.0% Peroni Libera beer.  ‘One of those please’

A few more to choose from….

You can imagine how my heart sank when she came back to the table with again an empty pair of hands. Seriously they can’t also have run out of beer too?

Yep, absolutely. I gave up at this point and asked for some sparkling water.

We sat chatting for awhile, catching up on life and waiting for someone to come and take our order.

And we waited…

Eventually a young man came over who pleasantly asked us what we would like to order. Jane went with the Fish Pie and I asked for Steak and Eggs.

Dinner Time

This consists of minute steak, two fried eggs and rosemary salted fries. Charlie (that was his name) asked how I would like my minute steak cooked.

Rare please.

His response floored me… ‘Sorry, we can only cook the steak medium or well done.’

A minute steak?

Surely a well done minute steak would be no different to Shoe leather!

It isn’t just minute steak; I don’t like any other cut of steak cooked medium or well. Give me the thickest fillet and I want it rare. Sirloin, rare. Rump? Yes, you got it, Rare!

I told him to forget the steak, I would have a burger instead. With cheese, please.

‘Would you like that medium or well done?

Now, I like my burgers medium. I don’t want them extremely pink and mushy, I want them moist and tasty, yet firm.

Now given that we had arrived at 7pm, it was now nearly 8.20pm and so far all I had been given was a glass of sparkling water.

Eventually Charlie arrived with Janes’ Fish Pie. It looked as if it had been sat under the hot lamps for *quite* awhile.

Then my burger arrived, which looked a little black.

Crispy Critter

Now, it could just have been the chargrilled outside. Maybe the middle was moist and full of flavour.

I broke the burger into two halves and it was as dry as the Sahara. Literally devoid of moisture and pretty tough in texture. There was absolutely no way I was going to force myself to eat it AND then pay for the privilege, so I managed to flag a waiter down and said that the medium burger I had ordered was burnt.

She took the plate away and said she would bring a fresh burger for me. She offered to take Janes’ Fish Pie away, but she didn’t want to wait for a fresh one as time really was ticking on.

A second burger was brought out and was marginally better than the first, but was nowhere near medium. However it was now nearly 9pm and I couldn’t wait any longer.

Turban Time

We ate the meals which were very substandard compared to normal and contemplated what we would have for dessert. Yes, we really were going to be either brave or stupid.

Sadly after 20 minutes of waiting to be served, we cut our losses and decided we would just ask for the bill.

Whilst waiting to pay, one of staff (I would imagine a supervisor or team leader) came over and asked if everything was okay. Being very British we said ‘Yes, it was okaaaaay’

To which she said, ‘Oh clearly there has been an issue, please talk to me about it’

What our meal DIDN’T look like

We told her what had happened from start to finish and she couldn’t have been any more apologetic. She went onto explain that the restaurant had lost over half its staff during COVID, as they all got other jobs when the restaurant was forced to close.

They were both short staffed and had new inexperienced staff working and they hadn’t yet got things up to their full standards. She knocked a huge chunk off the bill which certainly was gratefully received.

Saying goodbye to Jane, I got in my car and looked at the time. It was almost 10pm and we had been there for nearly three hours.

Now you may think that this is a horrible, negative post about a rubbish experience at a local restaurant, but it is a little more than that.

For three hours Jane and I sat in the late evening sun. We chatted about everything from the exciting to the mundane, and caught up on months worth of nattering.

This was the first time I had been able to properly socialise with her for several months, due to the Pandemic. We actually got to spend time in each others company, enjoying the weather and watching the World go by.

Okay, the meal was mediocre, but the company was exceptional. Because the staff were inexperienced and quite busy, we were left for long periods at a time, which although a little frustrating, also meant that we were able to chat undisturbed.

Ready for the evening ahead

The best part of it all? Being able to go out in public, enjoy time with my friend and actually sit outside in the glorious evening sun. It really was an amazing, warm evening and it was a delight to be outside in a summer outfit, rather than a big coat, scarf and hat!

And if this Pandemic has taught me one thing, it is to treasure the people we love and to make time for and with them. After all, you never know what the future brings.

Don’t put off till tomorrow, what you could do today. You might have missed the last opportunity to do whatever it was that came your way.

I certainly intend to make the most of every adventure, opportunity, chance and possibility that comes my way, after all you only live once.

Till next time,

SPSG xxx